reflections on my job

My "dogs are slaves" friend also oriented himself to his job as a caged bird would to the world....and it got me thinking

We all have our own worlds - our own escapes. And I don't think spending time in those worlds is anything that should be looked down upon - as long as you do not retreat to them permanently. For as wonderful and precious as our reflection time is, it is our connection to each other that makes us truly human - and our humanness is nothing to escape.

I too feel like a caged bird. My wings get cramped, yearn for the freedom of flight. My mouth will thirst for the sweet taste of independence - pure, unadulterated abandon - from judgment, expectations and someone besides myself to hold me accountable for my thoughts and actions.

So I escape. Into different worlds - different realities - places that seem to everyone else like a fantasy, but to me is a different shade of what life could be, what life might be. I write. I read. I ride my bike. I take Huck out to explore. I dream and ponder. And, when I need more than that, I take a trip. I physically and drastically change my surroundings. I escape with everything I need in a pack on my back and the possibility of falling off the grid ahead of me....

Escape is how I cope. But more importantly, escape is how I test myself, grow and prove to myself that I will do or die - that if I fall, it won't hurt as much as the stings of regret for never having climbed.

Right now, I try not to blame or criticize, but I do not simply accept - even when I know that it is not my battle to fight. I just hold onto hope. I hold tight to faith in the noble goals of the organization and I cheer on the minority that chooses to fight for those cherished ideals. For they have a formidable battle ahead of them; swimming upstream until they can figure out how to shift the directions of the currents through sheer determination. I wish them well in this fight, but turn my eyes to another path - pour my focus into the passions of my heart and give everything in me to my own crusade. For those ideals, while noble are not the stuff of my soul.