my life in solitary confinement

This was almost another title for my blog.....but i didn't want to be too melodramatic.

Solitary: My loving nickname for Connecticut. This is due to the entire atmosphere of the North East. Oh if you grew up here, or have any blood ties here, I am sure it's quite lovely. Quaint, even. But undoubtedly, Connecticut is part of a culture as frigid as a frozen New England winter. And the funny thing is, people up here know it! I was just told the other day, and notice, I quote: "You've only been here since July? Oh, I hope you have a job where you can just work a lot! You're not going to make many friends." I responded appropriately: nervous laughter. So, the native continued, "Yeah, I hope you can work a lot. I'd want to, if I was new here. I grew up here. See, people around here are really into their families, but there are not too many transient people, so they pretty much ignore them."

Now that the sun sets around 4 in the afternoon, it does feel like being left alone in the dark. I've compensated though. I bought some bright lights for my living room and will sacrifice my electric bill to bring a little bit of light to my winter days.

But I have news for you, Connecticut. (All this time in solitary has given me time to think and I've developed some theories)

1) People here are snobby. I don't fault them necessarily. It's cultural, I'm sure. And I'd bet they are warm and gushy and the nicest people on the planet....as long as you are not a transient.

2) Yankees fans are jerks. Every time I see anyone sporting anything Yankees, that N super-imposed on a Y symbol, whether it be a sticker on their car, a hat on their head, a shirt on their back, a 14kt gold necklace around their neck, I can't help but think: asshole. It's true.

3) Drivers here are shameful. I don't care how long your commute is, or how long you've been stuck in traffic, there is no excuse for speeding or passing people on narrow residential roads. Especially when there are kids waiting for their school buses on the sidewalks.

4) Dunkin Donuts sucks. It does. Period. If you disagree with me, you are wrong. The coffee is a nasty excuse for brown sugar water with a splash of cream. It shouldn't be called coffee.

5) If you are from New York or Massachusetts, you are not special. You do not deserve "drive up the shoulder of the highway rather than merge like everyone else" privileges. Stop acting like you are immune from traffic laws and etiquette. No one likes you.

6) Private Beaches should not exist! Stop pretending like you own the beach. For starters, your crappy beach front property is along one of the most disgustingly polluted bodies of water in the US: Long Island Sound. It's no precious gem for you to safeguard and covet. You've already over-populated this area and destroyed the water. You might as well let it go and stop posting signs about private property. You don't own the sand. It's God's sand. You don't own the water. It's Gods water too---free to go where the tides pull it. Lay off it. Let people walk on the beaches freely.

7) There is no reason to be so rude. No one wants to move here anyway. Stop honking. Stop cutting people off in parking lots. Stop running red lights.

8) Apple Cider and Maple Syrup are truly wonderful. Just take some time to really enjoy things like that. There are some cool things about living up here.....if we could all just take some more time to enjoy them.